I spoke a message this weekend to our church as part of our series, Roadblocks. (addressing the issues in our lives that keep us from going deeper in our faith). My message was on the “Fear of Risk.” I always find it amazing that as I near speaking a message God takes me through experiences which challenge me to “own” the message. This message topic and date had been calendared many months ago, but as we neared it I had the whole crisis of faith regarding our house sale (read the story in earlier posts). I of course wove it into the message and I believe I was sharing truth I didn’t just know about but knew.
But in the midst of all of this I am still working out the rebirth of many other dreams. The dream for financial and “stuff” freedom is only part of a bigger dream to live a “dangerous” gospel again. I have felt like I personally have gotten in the routine a lot in the last few years. I have been on a serious journey these past two years to be shaken up and out of my comfort zone. God is working in me to dream again, to hunger for more of Him, to be used more by Him, to be more radical in Kingdom building. Along the way I have been addressing family of origin issues that were holding me back, I have dealt with issues where I was placing my trust and finding comfort in more than God, and most recently the home sale where God was working in me to show me that not only can I hear His voice prompting me, but I can trust Him to take me through it. But this is not the end of what is going on.
I had a meeting the morning before I spoke the message and the person in the meeting used a phrase that I had planned to say in the message. A key phrase that God used to jolt me and confirm that what we were talking about I needed to sit up and pay attention to. It was in the context of a growth change that I was dragging my feet on and finding ways to say, “yeah, but…” But God took me right back to what I felt He was leading me to say to the church, “Your whole life has led to this moment to take the risk, the risk that will bring the breakthrough!”
Once again, “my” messages are really God’s message to me first.